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Season 5 Episode 1 - Ceiling Fan Mail
Season 5 begins as Ethan tries to return to a normal life...which might not be so easy.

Welcome to The Ceiling Fan board. Please do not feed the singing tortoises.

Hahaha! xD

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Hahaha! xD

Post by Kaida on Mon Apr 22, 2013 3:27 pm

Post your funniest and corniest jokes here.

A blind man with a seeing eye dog at his side walks into a grocery store. The man walks to the middle of the store, picks up the dog by the tail, and starts swinging the dog around in circles over his head. The store manager, who has seen all this, thinks this is quite strange. So, he decides to find out what's going on. The store manager approaches the blind man swinging the dog and says, "Pardon me. May I help you with something." The blind man says, "No thanks. I'm just looking around."

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Re: Hahaha! xD

Post by Bid Wouldahadit on Mon Apr 22, 2013 3:37 pm

Person1: guess what I've had stuck in my head for a long time.??
Person2: idk, what?
Person1: my brain!
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Re: Hahaha! xD

Post by Christina the Regina on Mon Apr 22, 2013 6:59 pm

A man walks into a bar, sits down, and orders a drink. As he's drinking, he looks around and his eye is immediately caught by the man sitting next to him. The man has a big, orange head. The first guy does his best to ignore his neighbor and orders another drink. Chugging it down, he tries gather up the courage to ask the other guy what happened to his head, but he can't bring himself to do it, so he orders another drink. The first guy tries to concentrate on his drink, but he just keeps thinking about that big, orange head. He orders a fourth drink, then a fifth and then a sixth. His head whirling, he turns and once again looks at his neighbor, but can't bring himself to ask about the big, orange head. So he orders yet another drink, looks at the big, orange head, and turns away. After his eighth drink, the first guy finally musters up the courage and says to the man with the big, orange head: "so tell me, why do you have a big, orange head?" The man looks at him a moment, than says: "you see, a few years ago, I was stranded on a desert island with no means of escape. As I searched around, I found an old lamp which I rubbed in order to shine it. To my great surprise, a genie appeared, promising to grant me three wishes. Immediately I wished to possess a vast amount of wealth and it was granted, I was the richest man in the world. Then I wished to have the most beautiful woman alive as my wife, and once again I was immediately gratified." "What was your third wish?" The first man inquired eagerly. "That's where I think I went wrong" replied the man with the big, orange head, "I wished for a big, orange head."
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Re: Hahaha! xD

Post by Garrett J Vandenberg on Mon Apr 22, 2013 7:20 pm

@Christina, I was actually considering posting that joke myself. It's hilariously ironic because of how un-ironic it is.
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Re: Hahaha! xD

Post by Christina the Regina on Mon Apr 22, 2013 10:21 pm

Garrett J Vandenberg wrote:@Christina, I was actually considering posting that joke myself. It's hilariously ironic because of how un-ironic it is.

No way! It didn't seem that funny when I first heard it, but now every time I tell I laugh so hard that I ruin it. queen
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Re: Hahaha! xD

Post by Liz'alike on Tue Apr 23, 2013 3:03 pm

A tourist on a farm asked the farmer why one pig had a wooden leg.

The farmer said, "That pig is the bravest pig I ever saw."

"So why does he have a wooden leg?" the tourist asked.

"One night, our house caught on fire, and he came inside and woke us all up."

The tourist asked again, "So, why does that pig have a wooden leg?"

"You can't eat a pig that brave all at once!"

Kinda funny. My sister heard that from a friend once.
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Re: Hahaha! xD

Post by Bid Wouldahadit on Tue Apr 23, 2013 3:37 pm

How long did cain hate his brother?

As long as he was abel.
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Re: Hahaha! xD

Post by C-guy on Fri May 10, 2013 11:43 am

Deep Questions to Think About

Why are they called "stands" if we sit in them?

Why do noses run and feet smell?

Would a fly with no wings be called a "walk"?

When a door is open, it's called "ajar". Why isn't an open jar called "adoor"?

Why are we more likely to wreck when we're being "wreckless"?

Why is it called "rush hour" when everyone slows down?

Why do we drive on the parkway and park in the driveway?

How does a snowplow driver get to work on a snowy morning?

Send a package by car, and it's called a shipment. Send it by ship and it's called cargo!

Why are there Interstate highways in Hawaii?

What do you do if you see an endangered animal eating an endangered plant?

Should vegetarians eat animal crackers?

And what do sheep count when they can't sleep?
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Re: Hahaha! xD

Post by Liz'alike on Fri May 10, 2013 4:21 pm

I LOLed at all of those, C-Guy! Bravo!
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Re: Hahaha! xD

Post by C-guy on Fri May 10, 2013 9:06 pm

Liz'alike wrote:I LOLed at all of those, C-Guy! Bravo!
*bows* Thank you. Thank you very much.
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Re: Hahaha! xD

Post by George Scheller (GS) on Fri May 10, 2013 11:41 pm

One day long ago there was a woman who never complained. Of course that was long ago and that was only one day.
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Re: Hahaha! xD

Post by Ceilingfanlover:) on Sat May 11, 2013 12:28 pm

George Scheller (GS) wrote:One day long ago there was a woman who never complained. Of course that was long ago and that was only one day.
Did you SERIOUSLY just say that?

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Re: Hahaha! xD

Post by Garrett J Vandenberg on Sat May 11, 2013 5:41 pm

Haha, that's amazing.
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Re: Hahaha! xD

Post by C-guy on Sat May 11, 2013 6:43 pm

Ceilingfanlover:) wrote:
George Scheller (GS) wrote:One day long ago there was a woman who never complained. Of course that was long ago and that was only one day.
Did you SERIOUSLY just say that?
XD! So true!
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Re: Hahaha! xD

Post by Ceilingfanlover:) on Sat May 11, 2013 8:11 pm

C-guy wrote:
Ceilingfanlover:) wrote:
George Scheller (GS) wrote:One day long ago there was a woman who never complained. Of course that was long ago and that was only one day.
Did you SERIOUSLY just say that?
XD! So true!

Murder List:
116
Justin Bieber
Nicki Minaj
GS
My annoying neighbor's dog
C-GUY.

This list just keeps on getting bigger.

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Re: Hahaha! xD

Post by Christina the Regina on Sat May 11, 2013 9:57 pm

Ooh, ooh, I wanna be in your list! JK, though I do think that that joke is funny.
Uncle, uncle, uncleuncleuncle! Lol
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Re: Hahaha! xD

Post by Ceilingfanlover:) on Sat May 11, 2013 11:04 pm

1. CtR
2. C-Guy
3. GS
4. 116
5. JB
6. My neighbors annoying dog that barks from 5 am to midnight

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Re: Hahaha! xD

Post by Christina the Regina on Sun May 12, 2013 12:08 am

Lol
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Re: Hahaha! xD

Post by Liz'alike on Sun May 12, 2013 4:59 pm

Ceilingfanlover:) wrote:Murder List:
116
Justin Bieber
Nicki Minaj
GS
My annoying neighbor's dog
C-GUY.

This list just keeps on getting bigger.
I laughed at this. Good one Wink lol




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Re: Hahaha! xD

Post by C-guy on Sun May 12, 2013 7:00 pm

Ceilingfanlover:) wrote:1. CtR
2. C-Guy
3. GS
4. 116
5. JB
6. My neighbors annoying dog that barks from 5 am to midnight
"I'm gonna report you to the moderator! Your a creeper!" unsettled

Murder List.

No one, because I'm a Christian. Garrett
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Re: Hahaha! xD

Post by Ceilingfanlover:) on Sun May 12, 2013 8:04 pm

Hey, even Jesus got angry! Very Happy I know. It was a joke....

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Re: Hahaha! xD

Post by C-guy on Thu Jun 06, 2013 2:26 pm

Go up to someone and say "I love you", except in German. It's sounds so much more terrifying! http://translate.google.com/translate_t?rlz=1C1GGGE_enUS406US406&biw=1280&bih=937&noj=1&um=1&ie=UTF-8&hl=en&sl=en&tl=de&text=i+love+you&client=ob
(press the listen button on the right side).

"Ich Liebe Dich!"
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Re: Hahaha! xD

Post by C-guy on Thu Jun 06, 2013 2:31 pm

Also, try to say "bubbles" in an angry voice without shouting. Yes
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Re: Hahaha! xD

Post by Mary Beth on Sun Jun 16, 2013 2:35 pm

My friend told me this one, i thought it was hilarious, maybe you guys will think so to. (:


Why did the monkey fall out of the tree?
-because it was dead
Why did the other monkey fall out of the tree?
-because it was stapled to the dead monkey
Why did the other monkey fall out of the tree?
-because it thought it was a game
Why did the refrigerator fall out of the tree?
-because it couldn't hold on
Why did the little girl fall of her bike?
-because she got hit by 3 monkeys and a refrigerator
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Re: Hahaha! xD

Post by C-guy on Sun Jun 16, 2013 5:56 pm

That joke is pretty good!
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Re: Hahaha! xD

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